Vickie Diablos, 21.504 years old, finally had her first full body check three days ago (since that’s the only way the Aussies would let her set foot on their soil). After getting my hands dirty, squashing my boobs against a cold metal plate and trying to read mini font off a wall one thousand miles away… *ahem* as in the mandatory pee-in-the-cup, chest X-ray and eye tests, I met the last doctor.

She had instructed me to take off my shoes, socks and outer trousers and unhook my bra, then turned away so I could remove the items without being stared at. I did as I was told, but was soon greeted with a semi-annoyed “Don’t take off your panties!” when I was pulling my trousers off.

But I didn’t take off my panties.

“Don’t take off your… oh,” she said, laughed, then apologised. And laughed.

I was probably her first patient who wore a thong. :P