All images used are “no attribution required” photos apart from the two small trees in the header image (those are from a brush pack that’s no longer available). The reused profile picture will likely be replaced with another one of me wearing a funny hat come April. Transparent PNG images and multiple class fail in IE6. Some items in the sidebar are slightly out of place in IE6 & 7 because of browser bugs. Text-shadow fails in IE6, 7 & 8. The solution is clear: IE users should switch to a better browser.

So, other than those issues and the layout possibly being too pale, or strange rainbow / birds / tree / trunk / triangular land mass thingy placement… comments?

• He’s so gorgeous. Talented, too!
• He’s so gorgeous.
• He’s so talented.
• He’s a douche.

People’s general comments about female public figures:

• She’s so gorgeous. Talented, too!
• Gorgeous? She’s an airhead.
• Who cares if she’s talented if she’s fugly?
• She’s a douche. Fat and ugly, too. What? If she can’t handle the criticism, she shouldn’t put herself out there.

Discuss.

This layout is kinda strange and 2005. It also absolutely breaks on IE6. I can probably recode the CSS but those users can also fuck off and die should seriously reconsider their browser choice. Certain unknown funky things may happen on IE7 as well; they may or may not be fixed.

And yes, that’s my electric violin in the header image. I picked up that cheap violin here in Australia. It’s quite decent after I replaced the strings that came with it with a nice, new set.

Here’s a picture of said violin half in action:

Gah! Mum! If I knew you’re taking a picture, I’d have sat up straight, hidden the Michelin, stopped pouting and maybe, you know, held a bow and done some proper fingering. Candids ftl.

Before you try to play the music in the background image on your instrument of choice and go all, “What the fireball was Mozart thinking?”, note that the piece is in A major, first line = B♭ clarinet (I think — I don’t know much about wind instruments), second and third = violins, fourth = viola, and the barely visible fifth = cello. Learn your clefs.

And now Vickiepedia sinks back into the dust.

1. Tell you why I friended you added you on my blogroll, regularly comment on your blog, etc.
2. Associate you with something; fandom, a song, a colour, a photo, a word, etc.
3. Tell you something I like about you.
4. Tell you a memory I have of you.
5. Ask something I’ve always wanted to know about you.
6. Tell you my favourite user pic of yours.

In return, you must post this in your LJ/DW/blog/whatever.

Also, in 1945, a young girl named Katu Lata Kulu came over to America in a grey boat from Africa. A mysterious man killed her by cutting the word “LATUALATUKA” into her back. Now that you have read this message, she will come to your house on a full moon and steal your soul unless you follow these directions:

1. Retype this message as a comment for 3 other videos.

“This is a five-by-four screen,” I said. “You’re still using a four-by-three resolution on it.”

She blinked.

“You know? The ratio? Five… to… four,” I explained, accompanied with body motions that somewhat resembled the chicken dance.

Turns out when someone doesn’t speak your “language”, speaking slowly or doing the chicken dance doesn’t really help.

I grabbed her mouse as she continued to look at me in confusion. Minimise all, right click, click, click, click, click: 1280×1024; there, a correct screen resolution for a shiny new screen. I smiled, satisfied, and turned to walk away (casually noting the lingering confusion on the colleague’s face), giving myself a mental pat on the shoulder for an unpaid job well done.

“OH MY GOD!” A scream of terror.

I paused, thinking if I’d forgotten to apply the new screen resolution setting properly so the screen had automatically reverted back to 1024×768 while she’s admiring the sharper images. It didn’t.

“Why is everything so tiny? Why do I look so fat in the picture?!” She cried.

And then I cried too.

(She insisted on switching back to 1024×768. I undid my mental pat on the shoulder and complied.)

Here is a sample of the Guild Wars (Guild Wars Prophecies) opening theme song: DirectSong > Guild Wars > 01 – Opening Theme.

Here is the movie’s official site: Traditional Chinese version, Simplified Chinese version or English version.

This is my expression after I heard the song on the movie’s official site:

Still not quite the porn entry I mentioned at least 100 years ago. But random new layout? You betcha.

Layout should work on all modern browsers, as well as older browsers you should never touch again, such as Internet Explorer 6, Internet Explorer 5.5, Internet Explorer 5.01, Internet Explorer in general, (layout now fluid and no longer works on IE5.5 and below), Mozilla Firebird 0.7, Opera 7.11, Netscape 7.2, etc.

Comments, constructive criticism and error reports mucho appreciado, as usual.

Now to pick up blogging again…

I can’t quite decide whether I love or hate you, Vickie, you moron.

Apparently, however, with Optus’ phone line you’re pretty much stuck with Optus’ ADSL plans or nothing, which, of course, the company never mentioned or hinted because they want to sell their own overpriced products. What also irked me was that none of my Australian computerphile and technophile friends who heard about my plan of getting a new connection seem to be aware of this, or didn’t think it was necessary to warn me at all. No, it’s not their fault; I just want to blame someone, okay? THIS IS MY BLOG!

Anyway… Now I’m practically down to 5 options:

1. Continue to share the connection with the landlord’s family and let the phone line die after 12 months, all the while try not to kill the landlord’s son, and try not to let the landlord’s son kill me; or

2. find an affordable, i.e. non-existent, cable plan; or

3. go with Optus’ Internet plans, which is way out of budget and essentially a rip-off; or

4. cancel the phone line for a $200 fee, sign up with Telstra for $300, then sign up with the ISP of my choice; or

5. build a time machine and try to stop my past self from signing up with Optus.

None of which, unfortunately, particularly appeals to me.

Or maybe I really need to just GTFO of this otherwise fine country.

*Warning: This is a long, rambly rant entry. (At least I warned you somewhere!)

UPDATE: Turns out there’s an old, inactive Telstra phone line lying around in the house so I looked into this Naked DSL thing. I called the Telstra people about the line at first and the woman yelled at me when she heard that I only wanted to get Naked DSL on it (I shouldn’t have told her that; or called Telstra, even).

I later called and signed up with iiNet (the rep laughed when he heard about the Telstra woman’s response); but the Optus tech used my Telstra line instead of giving me a new one so I had to call Optus to come in and fix it again (for free; the woman on the line was also very nice and polite). iiNet then did something and said my line was activated but I couldn’t get connected. I called in again and they said there’s something wrong with the Telstra line so a Telstra tech came in (for free). Telstra tech did something while I greeted him with morning breath…

36 days later, I’m finally connected to iiNet. The waiting period was very long in my case but things have been good so far otherwise. The friends say I get disconnected on MSN every now and then, though.

Special thanks to the landlord’s son and his girlfriend for their invaluable help. We don’t have to kill each other now.

Food stain on the keyboard has been photoshopped out. But that fluffiness on the side of the I and 9 keys? I don’t know what they are. I didn’t dare to zoom in.

穎琪 would be my Chinese given name. I’m just that cool.

But I forgot to eat dinner.

Alternative version names: Bad Hair Day; Shiny Forehead; I’m Holding a Blue Cup?; There’s a Male Bum Behind Me; See, Even My Keyboard is Cooler than Yours.