If I first claim to be a highly logical, scientific and secular person and then jokingly tell you that my hips and thighs are Sagittarian features, the correct response that would earn the highest approval rating from me would be to (jokingly) point out how hypocritical, illogical, unscientific and superstitious of me to say that — which I’m not really, mind. Also, my hips and thighs are fine.

My friend? He said: “oooh no wonder”.

Vickie disapproves (-18) I should stop playing Dragon Age: Origins.