Vickiepedia

I dreamt; the dream was very o_0. Or O_o. Or 0_O. And so on.

It was a well-lit room, where 16 to 20 people, including myself, stood in a circle. We were informed that we would be killed one by one, but none of us seemed to be shocked as if we accepted it as our inevitable fate. We were each handed a piece of paper, and were expected to jot notes as the announcer babbled on. I managed to write something that made sense despite the fact that I couldn’t hear (or remember) a thing s/he was saying, but as soon as I finished and was admiring whatever I had written (har!), the person on my left snatched my paper while the person on my right shoved his/hers into my hands. (Ah, so we were to swap notes — all you had to do was ask! Anyway…)

I tried to read what the person wrote; it seemed to be in Chinese (my first language), a list of sorts, but I didn’t quite understand what it meant. There wasn’t any time for me to ask about it, though, as we were sent to our rooms immediately afterwards.

A slight jump, and I was suddenly lying on my right side on the bed in the dream. This room was very bright as well. I could somehow see (huh?) that people were having sex in the next rooms, but I was undisturbed by everything — until I suddenly realised that I was the first person to be killed as I felt a stab in my back.

I couldn’t move, didn’t struggle, the murderer/executioner stabbed me a few more times. It didn’t hurt, actually, I just couldn’t breathe; although I didn’t seem to have made any effort to try to breathe, which was slightly worrying. I woke up from the dream then, calm as ever…

This is not the first time I’ve dreamt about being (or was about to be) stabbed in the back, but like I said… o_0, O_o, 0_O, etc.

When I was very young, there was this one nightmare that haunted me many times, in which I was forced to walk back and forth repeatedly in a sleepwalking/ Chinese zombies sort of fashion. There are random grown-ups who were made to do that alongside me as well, and we would keep on walking like that without any form of communication. However, the more I walked, the more nauseous I’d become. Before I couldn’t take it any more, though, it’d spiral and “everything” would come to an end. I’d wake up then, never had to throw up (thankfully), but the feelings certainly weren’t pleasant at all. I never understood those dreams.

Those nightmares stopped somehow when we moved house, but I started to have bad dreams of other things. I’d be in a room — a dark one, usually, with a lot of insects around me. They’d either be flying on the ceiling, crawling on the floor, or crawling all over me. I’d get up very quickly, especially in the last case, and would literally check that there are indeed no insects on the bed or in the room.

And ever since my braces were taken off (eight years ago?), I’ve been dreaming about my teeth falling out. I’d, at first, think that my teeth weren’t at the right place and try to move and fix them with my fingers. They’d look aligned for a bit, but would start to fall out several at a time until not many are left. I’d try to put them back in place, but would panic (and whimper?) when I realised that the teeth would just never go back to where they used to be.

The insect and teeth nightmares still happen frequently enough these days. If they meant anything other than what they appeared, then I’m really at a loss of what could be bothering me so much for so many years…

I haven’t had these many lucid dreams in a long while.

Dream #1

In the beginning, I was 迪阿比羅斯, the character I played in Lineage 2. I seemed to have violated some sort of rules and was running away from an authority. I went to a tall building that looked as though it was still under construction on the outside, but I knew that the top most floor was my office / the headquarters.

I ran up the stairs, and saw 伊狄亞, the character played by my brother, standing idly near the edge of a fenceless balcony on one of the lower floors. I approached her (since Bro played a female character ) and noticed that she was staring at a UFO on the sky. I wanted to look at the UFO as well, but fearing that I might fall off, and since we weren’t grouped, I couldn’t right-click her name to see clearly what she’s staring at, I gave up and continued my journey up the building.

I reached the top floor and found myself in a situation where I had to arrange some secret documents; but the dream jumped shortly and I was myself again. I was all naked (because I just had a swim and took a shower? – made total sense to me during the dream), sitting on a church bench a few rows above a white-haired, chubby, old lady that I seemed to respect a lot at that moment. I chatted with her, until she told me how fat and ugly I looked in the most straightforward but gentle way possible. I wasn’t offended, but ashamed and tried to walk away from the embarrassment.

I made my way slowly and carefully down the benches. Aunt Fatima was on my right watching me / waiting for me the whole time.

I saw a counsellor the next day (not because I had the dream ), and had the following dream during a nap at home after the session.

Dream #2

I was in a carpeted bedroom that belonged to me in the dream, and was rather stressed as the room was very messy. My maid (who wasn’t my current maid or any of the maids I’ve had) was in the room when I spotted a few cockroaches on the floor. I freaked out and sprayed them, but more cockroaches kept crawling out of nowhere. I then asked my maid what we’d be doing for the evening, she looked at her / our schedule and replied, “Dining out.”

“We‘re dining out?” me.
“No, I‘m dining out,” maid.

I was worried to hear that because it meant that I would be left to deal with the pests alone. Also, at some point, I reminded my brother (who wasn’t my brother in real life) to not to eat in my room as I just sprayed everywhere.

Suddenly, I was on an air-conditioned schoolbus with the maid sitting on my right. I curled up on the seat but felt an itch on the inside of my left leg. I looked and saw two cockroaches squashed on it. They were squashed, but their antennae were still moving about (which caused the itch). I screamed helplessly, and hoped that the maid could help me with it.

I’m not sure if I had literally screamed on the bed, but I definitely woke up more exhausted than I was before the nap (and hallucinated a moth flying on the ceiling for one second ).

Dream #3

I think I was watching telly in the dream, where a family featured in a programme as the ultimate Snoopy fans. The mother held her baby boy dressed in everything Snoopy up to the camera and claimed that she would win the competition. It was obvious that she was the biggest fan out of the opponents because nobody else had dressed their babies in Snoopy outfits. However, when the competition started, the judges pointed out that the company had only designed blankets, so everything else that the proud mother’s baby was wearing was fake. They were disqualified immediately and the mother went mad.

Later, the mother was seen holding her child, declaring that her family would no longer use anything Snoopy. She made the child tell the camera that they’re using Mickey Mouse stuff then on, but the kid mispronounced it as “mockey mouse”…

And finally, a short dream during yet another nap.

Dream #4

I dreamt that I was taking a nap in my dream during my nap, and I heard my parents’ yelling about a fire. I opened my eyes, but somehow just couldn’t get to my feet no matter how hard I tried, as if an invisible force confined me to my bed. So, instead of escaping from the fire, I planned, while still on the bed, what to take with me should a real fire start in my neighbourhood…

It’s always fun writing about dreams. Haha.

A short, somehow scary, somehow funny, somehow meaningful(?) dream I had during the 5-hour nap this afternoon…

I dreamt that I was with my Uni classmates. There are a few of them; a couple guys and a couple girls. We had to walk through this really dark hallway to get to the lecture hall to attend our next lecture. Although we all knew that the hallway is haunted, I decided to be at the very front since I always pretend to be brave and shit.

The hallway got darker and darker as we entered. I sped up and hoped that I’d get out of the place sooner. Along the hallway are small, dark, empty rooms. I didn’t dare to look and check if they were indeed empty.

We came to a left turn where I hit something. I glanced around and saw a white cat sitting on a small, elevated platform(?). The cat stared at me (although I couldn’t see its eyes), and there was a mysterious force that made me stroke the cat. The cat purred at my touch and my other hand joined the stroking automatically.

The touch was very real, so I kept telling myself that I wasn’t dreaming in the dream.

And then I realised that the cat owner, who looked really like Elvis Presley, was just lying around the corner, dead. I knew the cat killed him. At the same time, pictures of the cat singing karaoke appeared in my mind. Apparently this cat was a singer, and had been performing around the world with “Elvis”.

(Stroking pussies? )

September is almost over.

I don’t know what I feel about this month. Happy, sad, excited, bored… yeh, just like every other month.

Forgive my dull tone; I had a dream last night. I dreamt that I was to get married to a guy the next day. I was in my wedding dress, and Mum complimented that I looked stunning.

Yeh, you already know which girl was in my mind the whole time.

Anyway, back to reality.

My paternal grandmother is in hospital right now. Heart disease. Damn heart disease. Looks like it really runs through my father’s side. First my uncle, then my dad, and now my grandmother.

The doctor said that there’s nothing we could do about it. In other words, we’re to wait until she dies. Her situation isn’t that bad, and she could probably live for a few more years. And maybe more. I don’t know. I’m just guessing. I didn’t ask. I didn’t dare to ask.

I’m not even emotionally close to her. It’s just that feeling: somebody who was still talking to you just now, somebody who was still moving, somebody who was still alive; could be dead anytime. And of course, same applies to anybody and everybody – healthy or diseased.

My hamster is pretty old already. He could drop dead just anytime as well.

It’s okay. I’m okay. *sigh* It’s PMS indeed.