Vickiepedia » fail

I Wish I’d Made This Up

Vickie — Sat, 21 Nov 2009 00:28:10 +0000

I was pretty sure “What do you do during the weekends?” was what Examiner 1 asked. That’s one of the standard questions for that oral exam; pretty much free marks for grabs. I can’t say I was very well-prepared because I had a 1,000-word individual assignment plus a 12,000-word group assignment due the same day with 5 other classmates, in which only 3.5 of them were really active. But still. Weekends? I often play sports with my friends and practice the violin, among other things. Of course I’d study a lot if there’s an upcoming test. Then Examiner 1 would likely follow up and ask what sports I’m into. I would answer swimming and tennis. I prefer swimming because I don’t really like to sweat.

“What do you do during the weekends?”
“I often play video games alone.”

No, Vickie! Sports, friends, violin, study, swimming, tennis, sweat… remember?

“I, uh, often play video games…?”

Examiner 1 shot me an “are you for real” look.
Examiner 2 giggled.

Which is no biggie and just a language / preparation fail if I wasn’t telling the truth.

But I was. The actual things I do during all my weekends. Video games. Alone.

FML.

Racist Fail

Vickie — Sat, 26 Sep 2009 03:12:45 +0000

If you’re the average Guild Wars gamer who’s English-speaking, white, male, straight, young, doesn’t have a disability and so on, the worst insults that get thrown at you are probably the N word, “fag” or “gay”, and you’d probably go, “Whatevs! I’m not even black / gay.” and move on with your day.

If you’re like the rest of us, particularly those of us who run around with a Chinese character name but are absolutely and obviously not a bot or gold farmer, it’s not uncommon to encounter personal attacks from racists, even in the supposed safety of our own PVE district (Asia – Traditional Chinese).

3 months ago, I had these two Warriors in the Traditional Chinese district of Leviathan Pits, that came doing the taunt, point, shoo and laugh emotes as soon as I mapped in. Bear in mind that players have the complete freedom and choice to travel between any districts of the same area — their intentions were clear.

The exchange they probably expected:

Racist #1 taunts you.
元氣娜奧美 (my Warrior’s name): excuse me
Racist #1 taunts you.
Racist #1 taunts you.
Racist #2: sorry i dont speak freaky deeky
Racist #1: HAHAHA
Racist #1: pwnd
元氣娜奧美: 阿怎麼辦我不太會說英文耶…

What happened in reality:

What can I say? I’m a fast typist. You’d think that my “excuse me” would tip them off, too. Way to unintentionally pwn your own friend-in-crime.

As if failing like that wasn’t embarrassing enough, though, one of them then said:

Which is horrible Spanish, according to a friend’s friend who speaks Spanish. Why am I not surprised that it translates so well into English in an online translator?

But that’s not all! When I asked them if they’re aware that they’re in the Traditional Chinese district, they added a bold declaration that would make Freud proud!

(Adrian Victoria is my friend who’s actually also American.)

And then I reported them. Sadly, a few days off Guild Wars during the weekdays likely had little effect on them.

Oh look, it’s not just English-speaking players who would “accidentally” land in the Traditional Chinese district and “accidentally” type out loud, either.

And they’re only the milder racists in PVE.

You have no idea what it’s like to PVP if you have a Chinese name.

EPIC PHAIL

Vickie — Wed, 14 May 2008 09:27:36 +0000

Hmm, how do you put it into words? Pwned by a noob fail? Piano falls on head fail? Arrow to crotch fail? Already paid last month’s rent but the landlord forgot to mark it down and thought you were super late because you have a history of paying rent late fail?

Vickie, stop thinking you can just get out there unprepared and without sleep and still pull a passable presentation. You’ve embarrassed yourself in front of the whole fucking class! You phail! Now GTFO!